Reno's Missing Diary
by Bahaumaunt
Summary: A tattered old book found...The owner of this book? Reno of the Turks.
1. Diary Entry

_December 26_

_Dearest Diary,  
Dear Journal,  
Blond-Chick-whose-name-I-don't-remember,  
Ah screw this-To Bob, _

_A journal, huh? "Something where you write down your 'personal feelings' in"? Where does Elena get this crap? There's nothing much to do, so fine- feelings. I wish I owned Don Corneo's Place, I wish I had a free membership to the Honeybee in, I wish I remembered that hot blond chick's name, and I wish I got something better than this stupid journal for Christmas. But that's what you usually get from Elena. Something really, really stupid. And she expects you to like it! Like this year, she gave me this stupid journal, Rude a hairbrush, Reeve a bag of dog food, and Tseng a ten-pound bag of Beef Jerkey. Since Rude loves meat and Tseng's a vegetarian, and Rude is bald and Tsengy has that ugly mane of hair, they swapped. But lucky me gets stuck with this Diary. Even President Rufus wouldn't swap, and he got a plastic megaphone. Really, Elena is crazy this year. She sent flowers to the AVALANCHE gang!!!! She's going to get shot some day, I swear. _

_Ah Damnit, no! I'm getting used to writing in here!! Arrrgggh!!! And it's only been- what, a paragraph? I didn't know I could write that much in one sitting... Rude told me he didn't even know I could read. I went to school people!!! I'm not Yuffie or Vincent who spent their whole lives wasted. Heh, okay, maybe that's a bit of a lie._

_The only thing good about this book is the security stuff on it. For a stupid little journal, there are some pretty good tricks to it. It took me like ten minutes to open this cause it said "push" on the front when you were supposed to "pull" it. Some new chick, Rayna, helped me with that. Then I said something pervy and she slapped me. Note to self: Avoid Rayna!! Yeah, anyway, I can write in here and pretend to be actually working. So if Tseng looks over my should he'll just see the paragraph I'm currently writing. All others will be invisible! Spiffy, huh? Crap-_

_To Whom It May Concern,  
At ShinRa, we have heard of this "Male Belly Dancer" problem you have. We needed to take notifications of this catastrophic event due to the factorial event that Male Belly Dancers have the largest-_

_Hahahah I didn't even know what half of those words meant. Tseng's as dumb as a doorknob, so he just looked down, saw a bunch of big words, nodded, and walked away. Hahaha that stupid-_

_stomaches. So, Male Belly Dancers are a threat to your community as they will each all your children crops. You are advised to take some spades and-_

_Yeah, he's seriously gone now. Where was I? Oh who cares. Yeah... what to write... Um, My name is Reno, I am approximately 25, my hair color is red and spiky in a mulletish style... And my birthday is unknown!! Isn't that horrible? Rufus always says I was found under a cabbage leaf. That idiot, he keeps forgetting it was him that was found there._

_I work at ShinRa industries. There are a couple different divions there, and me, Elena, Tseng, and Rude work in the Turk one. Turk really isn't the official name though. We're supposed to be called the Investigation Division of the General Affairs Department, but who the Hell wants to say all that? We decided that since President ShinRa was pretty much all Turkish, Tseng wanted to name us the "Turks" in his honor. Biggest load of crap I've ever seen. We basically go out and kill a bunch of people for the company. But the best part of the job is our on theme song hah. Beat that. But we've had rough times too. We almost got fired a couple years ago 'cause of that anti-ShinRa group AVALANCHE. We all really screwed up with them. They killed Hojo and a ton of our SOLDIERs. Then about two years ago, some girly-mans Kaj, Zol, and Zooya or soemthing like that went psychopathic and tortured poor 'lena and Tseng. I still think that's what caused Elena's... loopyness. But then again, she has been crazy since I first met her. Heidegger and Scarlet also died triying to kill spiky-haird freak. They're not much of a loss, really. The only loss that kinda surprised us was Hojo's, since he's like the best madman you can find. I've heard that he's alive somewhere though. Him at that Vampire are in a fight, or... something like that._

_President Rufus has assigned some guy to be ShinRa's top Scientist. Rumor has it that he's even better than Gast AND Hojo. Whatever, I just hope he doesn't try any sick experiments on us._

_Whoa, I just noticed ShinRa suddenly got quiet. Elena's stupid Country music isn't playin'... Reeve isn't bothering Rude for gum... Eh, really, I don't hear anything. Am I going deaf? CRAP! NOOO!! I'm too young to die!!! Wait- hold on! I'm not deaf- I heard something shatter! What the Hell's going on? I'm going to check things out... Reno, over and out._


	2. Gershmer

In all the years at ShinRa, he had never heard a silence as deep as that one. It almost seemed like everything was frozen...

A noise sounded outside the room Reno was in, startling him. He nervously stood up from his seat and walked slowly out the door and down the hallway, his journal tucked firmly who-knew-where. A loud laugh broke the silence into a thousand pieces, growing louder as footsteps drew close around the red-haired Turk. Frightened, Reno ducked into the nearest door, a Meeting Office, only to nearly run out in shock. Surrounding the round table in the center of the room weere three ShinRa Executives. But they seemingly weren't dead, as Reno had at first thought, yet... it seemed they were in a frozen state, possibly their minds thrown into a deep limbo. But the more Reno looked around the room; it looked like time had simply stopped for them...

"Very good Reno! You're not as stupid as you look." Echoed around him, the voice cunning and full of malice.

Reno emitted an unvoluntary shriek, then leapt against the wall as if it would become a shield around him, "Who the Hell are you!??!"

With a soft flutter of a long lab coat, a figure with a thick mane of dark gray hair gently fell down in front of Reno, his back facing the Turk.

Reno cursed angrily to himself, "Hojo! I never trusted you- what the hell did you do to these people?!"

A low chuckle from the scientist silenced Reno, "Hojo? That fool cannot even attempt to do this magic. I am Gershmer! The Time Wizard!" A loud cackle of laughter followed.

Reno stood, silent and shocked, then found his voice had returned to him, "You're frickin' wacked, Hojo."

The figure stopped laughing and turned around. Whatever he was was, he definetly wasn't Hojo. Or even human, for that matter. His face was entirely coal black, his cat-pupiled eyes bright gray. As his mouth twisted into a malacious grin, very cliché sharpened teeth were seen. His body was bulky, and the lab coat seemed too tight on him. His ebony arms were clawed at the end, the dagger-like nails blood-red. "Say that now, Mortal."  
Reno pushed himself into the wall, his bright green eyes closed tightly. He slowly put his hands behind him and whispered one word- "Fire."

Flames instantly enveloped Gershemer, but no expected dying-screams fell to Reno's ears.

"Fool!" the flames danced away from the Immortal, as if they wouldn't come in contact with him, "I am a spirit of Magic! Wizard of Time! God or POWER! Reno- let's play a game to prove this! A game of survival!"

Reno blinked, thinking to himself, '_What. The Hell. Is going. On._' His hand shifted onto a second sphere of cool-feeling materia- Protect. And Cure was right next to it. If he couldn't hurt this freak, at least he'd be able to-

"Now now, that's not fair, a mortal playing with the gods' powers? No, no. You have to earn the right to use them, poor mortal. AH! And that leads to our game. Now, being kind as I am, I'll leave you a couple."

Reno felt his pocket grow lighter, and instantly checked to see why. He pulled out of his pocket only a few orbs of Materia- water, cure, ifrit, and a blank orb, as well as a woven little bag. Her stared at these with unbelief.

Gershemer leaned onto the table, gouging his claws into the thick wood surface, "That clear orb is a wild car for you, mortal, to make things a bit easier on you. Get it? Pick magic, summon, whatever. Mind you, maybe you pick Bahamut in one world, he'll keep that form even if you move to another."

Reno stared blankly at him, '_Other world...?'_ It was painful how confusing everything was.

Gershmer continued, "And in that bag are three pieces of Starstone. If you find yourself in a predicament, eat one, and you'll be thrown into a different universe. Also, if you die, one will automatically revive you, teleport you to a differrent world, then vanish. So bascially you have four lives, five if you can find the Pheonix Summon."

"Find...?" Reno whispered weakly. Everything was so overwhelming, so confusing. He slid down the wall onto the floor. What was going on??

Gersher nodded, "Yes, I've spead your materia throughout hundreds of worlds! YOU get to go find them!! And meanwhile I'll be watching your every move!" He laughed incredibly manaically, "Ciao kid!"

The wall Reno was leaning on instantly turned into a swirling black portal. Before he could react, a gust of wind shoved Reno through, threatening to rip him to threads if he held a resistance.

The last thing he heard was laughter.


	3. Diary Entry 2

_'Beesayed.' What a weird name for a place... And I know weird. I mean, how many people wake up one day, falling from the sky!!!, only to land on some giant freak-bird and a woman(an attractive one, I might add). Apparantly she was playing suicide to get her husband to not kill her boyfriend. Talk about 'DAMN!'_

Yeah, so we all got thrown in some basement wite these weeirrrd creatures and some deranged 'summoner.' He can summon a couple petty freak-things. Big Deal. Watch me summon Knights of the Round!!! Hahahha!!! But anyway, I noticed something really freaky during the battle. The 'Summoners' don't exactly have pockets, and they're little staves seemed pretty normal. They're really good at hiding all those summon materia... I'd really hate to find out where that guy hid his...

Anyway, before we meet Mr. PsychopatIwanttokillyouall guy, we found some girl named Rekoo. Rekoo Annoying as hell. She was rambling on about how we're all gonna die, and everyone was all "WTF?!" and it really looked like they weren't gettin' her. Maybe she was talking too fast for them. Yeaah that'd explain it. I'm used to 'lena's ramblings. So when it was clear I understood her, she started flipping out about something Al Bed. Never heard of him, and I don't really care to. Then we meet Looloo. Funny name heheheh. She is like the MOST Bad-ass chick I have EVER seen. Including Tifa. Damn that girl punches hard... Looloo is like, as crazy as Sephiroth. She could do some pretty nifty magic though, but she must've had a really large collection of materia hidden. Maybe that's why- er. Heheheh. Naughty thoughts.

Next up- Kimari! First impression- overgrown mutant cat who fell in blue paint. He was preettt-tttty interested in my electric rod, a bit too interested, if I maaay say so. Which I may. 'Cause this is MY journal. HAH!

Next there's Awrun. Sounds like "awwww, run!!" But he reeks of death, and is way to quiet. Like an emo boy. Or one of those silent-but-deadly types. Rude would love him. 

Finally- Tydis. He's pretty cool and all, even though he claims I stole his 'Luna.' Whatever that is. I probably met her some night and he found out. Whatever.

We're riding on this Smoopuff thing which kinda looks like Prez ShinRa in the morning. But with a really long nose. But yeah, we were gonna go to "Beesayed." The chicky who summons things said she wanted to go home for a while. I'd assume she's a bit emotionally shocked. I mean, she jumped off a building to scare her hubby into releasing her boyfriend. Messed up... I LIKE IT!!

Everyone is asleep right now, so I thought if I was gonna die, my death won't be a mystery. Maybe I'll mail this to Rude or something. Yeaah that'd work. It's getting to dark to see, I'll pick up tomorrow night, I guess.

Over + out, Reno.


End file.
